So…this retired forestry guy sits around the house all day… His wife says, “You could do something useful, like vacuum the house once a week.”
He gives it a moment’s thought and says, “Sure why not…show me to the vacuum.”
Half an hour later, he comes into the kitchen to get some coffee.
His wife says, “I didn’t hear the vacuum work, I thought you were using it?”
The exasperated man answers, “The stupid thing is broken, won’t start…got to buy a new one.”
“Really”, she says…, “Show me - it worked fine the last time.” So he did ……
THE UPGRADE
A farmer and his 15 year old son took his wife to the big city for a once in a lifetime trip.
While his wife went shopping, the father and son were amazed by everything they saw, especially the 2 shiny silver walls, that could move apart and then slide back together again.
The boy asked "What is this father?".
The father responded. "Son I have never seen anything like this in my life. I have no idea what it is.
While the boy and his father watched in amazement, an old lady in a wheelchair moved up to the walls and pressed a button.
The walls opened and the lady rolled through them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched the numbers above the walls light up sequentially.
They continued to watch until it reached the last number, then the numbers began to light in the reverse order. Finally the walls opened again and a gorgeous 24 year old blonde stepped out.
The father, not taking his eyes off the young women, said quietly to his son...."Quick, go get your mother".